A Safe Place

My Story, By Treva Susuras

There three things in life that we need to survive. Love, Security, and Significance. If one of those things are missing, we tend to venture off and try and find what we need in other people. We all know that other people are just what we just said, they are “other people” not much different than us. So, we try and get from them what they may not be able to give.

People are just people, and they will let us down from time to time. Most are just trying to get by and do the best they can. How can we expect them to meet our every need? We can’t. There is only one person that can meet every need and that is Jesus Christ.

For years I tried to find all these things in the people around me. That’s why I was married 4 times, did drugs and alcohol, among other things… Always looking for the reason I was even born. At the end of the day, it was always the same. I was left alone, hurt, feeling like I had a big empty hole in my soul. I was a bad girl and I liked it, or so I thought I did. Being bad was the only thing I felt like I was good at.

I did not have a stable childhood, my dad was an alcoholic, and my mom was always a nervous wreck (her words). So, she had to take nerve pills to be comfortable and deal with us (my dad, brother and me). My sister was pretty good.

By the time my mom finally left my dad (after 21 years) she did meet a stable man with lots of love for us. He was good, dependable, loving, and kind. By that time my brother and sister had grown up and moved out. I was the one left at home. So, I did get just a bit of security but had already lived too many years in disfunction. His order seemed like he was trying to run my life and at 10 I was ready to run my own life. By the time I was 13 I was getting high and drinking…

By the time I was in my 20’s my step dad, the only security we ever know died of a stroke. I wanted to die with him. I was afraid to live without him, and spiraled out of control.

It went from bad to worse, I hurt people I loved, and those I didn’t, I didn’t care about anyone but me. I even hurt my children, not on purpose but I did. I was a worthless, piece of nothing, or so I thought.

The third time I was married on our wedding night my brand-new husband went to the strip club. I was waiting for him and found out that’s where he was. I can tell you for sure that will make you feel important.

Did I mention what a great judge of character I was. Now moving on…

I met Doug, my husband of 33 years right now, although we have been together for 37 years. There was something different about him, I felt for safe with him for the first time in my life. Like I knew he would never hurt me, I was secure and loved. Now remember I said only Jesus can fill those needs and its true. But sometimes Jesus will use a person to get your attention. That something different in Doug was Jesus. He loved Jesus. He was full of Jesus and he didn’t play games with me. When I tried to get out of something by playing dumb, he would call me out on it. He would say you are not dumb so don’t act like you are. He would make me so mad. He would quote scripture to me and I would grab his bible out of his hand and toss it at him. But he just wouldn’t give up. He kept teaching me, showing me, loving me, and it was only through the strength of Christ that he kept trying.

And for my brother, if you are reading, God would not be able to fix me if I had stayed in Colorado. I had too many friends and too many places to run if I got mad at Doug or things got to hard. So, God moved us to Texas, where there was nowhere to run. (I was a runner). I began to go to church and learn about Jesus, and how he died for my sin. I began to learn that no matter who I am or who I was, Jesus loved me. That I mattered to Him and that I had significance. I mattered, someone cared for me and his Name is Jesus. He cared enough to send me Doug who was willing to fight for me. To change my life. God used Doug to change my life and now I can say I have had a wonderful life. Have we had some bumps along the way??? Yes!!! Many, but we work together until we work it out. Running is not an option anymore. Now, I have been through Bible College, and am an ordained minister. Hard to believe, God could use a wretch like me… but He did and still does.

I say all this so that it might minister to someone that is feeling like there is a big hole in you soul. Like you don’t matter, like no one cares what happens to you. There is someone that loves you very much, He is waiting for you to come to Him. His Name is Jesus. If you struggle with life issues or you are just lonely and depressed, God has the answer and His Name is Jesus. You matter, you are loved, and you are here for a reason. There is a place for you! Jesus is waiting.

Please reach out to us if you are struggling. Our phone number is 281-868-0537 or you can message me on messenger.

God bless and remember, who the Son sets free is free indeed! Never too late!!!